Fanfic Chaos: I'm not good at titles
by lsdfjkdsf
Summary: The xmen go online and learn that there are hundreds of stories written all about them and start looking at them. All sorts of stuff occurs because of what they read be a bad story if nothing at all happened
1. An Online Discovery

**Disclaimer: Shockingly, I don't own the x-men. Contain your grief. **

**Summary: The x-men learn that there are hundreds of stories written all about them and start looking at them. All sorts of stuff occurs because of what they read. **

**A/N: People write tons of fanfics about the x-men, so I wrote a fanfic about what happens when the x-men learn about all these stories. I can't write fancy accents, so just pretend that everyone went to English class and got rid of their accents. Oh, and this is my first fanfic, so pretend you like it. Wow, you have to do a lot of pretending.**

The x-men were sitting doing absolutely nothing on a hot July day. Logan was out of town, so the danger room sessions were insanely easy. No horrible enemy or mega powerful mutant had decided to attack the x-men, so it had been a quiet few weeks. Scott, Kitty, Kurt, and Rogue were all sitting in a room moaning about the heat.

"I'm sooooo bored" moaned Kitty.

"We could always do a little more training" suggested Scott.

"Not going tah happen" replied Rogue in a bored voice.

"There's nothing to do around here. I'm so bored." complained Kurt.

"Oh god. Remember the last time Kurt said he was so bored" Kitty said.

Scott shuttered. "That was bad. Very bad. You caused more destruction than Sabertooth, Remy, and Pyro combined."

"Plus, Logan nearly killed you when he saw what you did to his motorcycle."

"Where is Logan anyway?"

"Probably went on one of those 'learn more about my horrible past' trips"

"Doesn't he like, have anything better to do"

"Well, he'd probably make us run danger room simulations if he was around"

"Good point"

"So, what do you think he's going to bring home this time"

"Ah say he comes back with twenty government agents following him"

"Are you kidding, he's coming back with twenty corpses"

"I say he gets another government experimental clone"

"Relax, I know a wonderful place where you can find all the answers"

"Kurt, magic eight ball does NOT hold all the answers. I thought that was clear after you tried using it to get dating advice"

"Amanda wasn't happy, the eight ball betrayed me. But, I've got something even better. Be right back"

Kurt teleported out of the room, leaving everybody else wondering what Kurt was going to bring.

"Ah swear, if he brings another piece of junk he bought in a yard sale…"

Kurt suddenly teleported back with a laptop in his hands. He put the laptop on the table and opened the internet. Kitty walked over and took a look at the laptop.

"Isn't this like, Scott's laptop?"

"What! Kurt, how many times do I have to tell you that you can't download porn on my laptop."

Kurt typed on the computer and the google search page popped up. "Relax, I'm not looking for porn, I just want to know what Logan is doing."

"And you intend to look it up on google. Are you crazy? On second thought, don't answer that"

"Hey I found something. Wolverine goes on a journey to learn more about his past, and X23 decides to tag along. Hey, it's an entire story."

The other x-men, reasonably curious, gather around the computer. Scott pushes Kurt aside and started looking at the computer. After clicking a couple times, he opened up a page full of different stories.

"There are hundreds of stories here, and they aren't just about Logan, there about all of us."

Next chapter, they actually look at the fanfics (either that or suddenly Magneto attacks the institute and kills them all). This is just setting up the story. Review what you think of the idea or I'll go with the Magneto idea for chapter 2.


	2. Love plus Fanfics brings Depression

**Disclaimer: I bought the x-men on eBay. Just kidding, I don't own the x-men.**

**A/N: I got reviews, so I'll save the Magneto idea for another chapter. I do not own the fanfic ideas the x-men talk about. I'm not trying to copy someone's idea.**

After Scott told them that there were hundreds of stories written about them on the internet; Kitty, Kurt, and Rogue were all curious what people had written about them.

"Open up mine, I want to see what people wrote about me"

"No like, do me"

Kitty and Rogue began trying to shove Scott away from the computer so that they could look at their stories. Scott was meanwhile trying to look at his stories, but was having trouble since Kitty and Rogue kept pushing him. Kurt rolled his eyes and teleported out for a minute; then came back a few seconds later with three more laptops.

"Here, now we all can look at our wonderful stories"

Rogue happily took a laptop from Kurt. Kitty was a little more suspicious.

"Kurt, where exactly did you get these laptops?" asked Kitty.

"I borrowed them from school" Kurt replied with a noncommittal shrug.

Scott looked up worried and said, "It's the middle of summer, school is empty. You stole these laptops, didn't you?"

"I prefer to think I was borrowing them for an important educational exercise. Besides, the school wasn't empty, summer school was in session. Oh, and Lance says hi."

Kitty jumped up excited, "Like, what else did he say."

"That summer school sucks"

While Kitty continued to interrogate Kurt about Lance ("Like, how did he look", "What was he wearing", "Did he seem ok"), and Scott was busying doing his older brother thing ("Kitty, are you sure it's a good idea..."), Rogue was busy turning on her computer and looking at some of the stories.

"I am not this obsessed with Remy!" Rogue suddenly shouted.

Kitty, Scott, and Kurt all stared at Rogue.

"There are like 300 stories about me and Remy. I don't even like that swamp rat. I mean, there plot lines are insane. 'Rogue and Remy go back to New Orleans to settle one last score'. Who comes up with this stuff?"

"Didn't you all ready go there with Remy once"

"Well, he kidnapped me and forced me to go, but yeah. Some of these other ideas are even stupider, 'Rogue gets a life threatening disease and in comes Remy to save the day'. I don't even like Remy, but this is insane."

"cough denial cough"

"Very funny Kitty. You know, there are some interesting stories about you and Lance in here".

"Let me see". Kitty grabbed the computer out of Rogue's hands and looked up her name. Meanwhile, Scott went back to his computer, and Kurt gave Rogue another computer to use.

"So, what do ya think?" Rogue asked Kitty.

"It's so cute; I didn't know that people loved us as a couple this much."

"Almost every story in there is about how you and Lance can't be together. Half of them have Lance almost getting killed. How is that cute?"

"Trust me, when people write all these horrible things happening to us, it means they love us."

"You live in your own happy world, don't you."

"You're just jealous that nobody writes stories about you and Amanda. Rogue, I didn't know that our love lives were so fun to write about."

"Well, neither did I, but I was happier not knowing some of these pathetic stories. Hey Scott, how are you and Jean working out?"

Scott moaned and said, "Not so well. For some reason, everybody is calling us the annoyingly perfect couple and if writing stories about us breaking up in all sorts of ways. And what the hell is a JOTT? Do you think that Jean and I are too perfect and annoying?"

"Uhh…"

"Well…"

Seeing the distress on Scott's face, neither Kurt nor Rogue wanted to admit to Scott that he and Jean drove everybody crazy. Kitty however, was too busy looking at her stories with Lance, and gave an honest answer.

"cough yes cough"

Scott looked forlorn as he had never actually thought that he and Jean were annoying. He just thought that everybody else was jealous when they said that he and Jean got on their nerves (yes, he was in denial). Rogue shook her head at Kitty's thoughtlessness. "You have a bad cough Kitty; you really should get some cough medicine. NOW."

Kitty looked up at Rogue then looked at Scott's growing distress.

"Like, good idea Rogue. Bye."

Kitty quickly grabbed her computer and phased through the wall. Rogue and Kurt, who were also growing uncomfortable, held hands and Kurt teleported them out of the room. Scott sat there and decided he needed something to eat. (And thus began Scott's eating disorder, just kidding)

Kurt had teleported Rogue to the garden.

"Well, that could have gone better." Rogue said while looking at her computer some more. "Although I have to admit, some of these stories with Scott and Jean breaking up are funny."

"Relax, this is the perfect couple were talking about. I'm sure Scott will get over it in a week."

Professor Xavier, who had been admiring the flowers, drifted over to where Rogue and Kurt were looking at the computers.

"Oh, hey professor" said Rogue.

"Hello Rogue. I was just admiring the flowers. Say, could you two answer a question for me?"

"Sure professor, what's up?" asked Kurt.

"Why exactly do your laptops have 'Property of Baeville High' written on the back?"

**Give me good reviews or the x-men will make fun of every story you have ever written.**


	3. Logan overreacts

**Disclaimer: Still don't own the x-men.**

Both Kurt and Rogue were busy trying to come up with an excuse. Sadly, both of them were failing miserably.

"Err… they fell out of the sky" Kurt replied.

"Yeah, and we uhh… saw Magneto flying off in the distance. We were running to tell you, but it looks like you found us. Funny, isn't it." Rogue tried making Kurt's excuse just a little more believable. Professor Xavier just smiled and shook his head.

"That was a rhetorical question. I'm telepathic; I know exactly what happened."

"Oh."

"We will discuss your punishment in a moment. Would you care to tell me anymore about these stories you found online?"

"How did he learn about the stories?" Kurt whispered to Rogue.

"A flying monkey told me. I read your mind, don't you students ever learn it's impossible to get away with anything. Although some of you have some very disturbing thoughts…."

"Isn't that like, invasion of privacy or something?"

"Not at all, it's clearly marked in the contract you signed."

"Wait. We signed a contract?"

"Err… forget that talk about contracts" Professor Xavier focused for a moment and both of them forgot his last statement. After a moment, Xavier continued, "Now, would you care to talk to me about those stories?"

"What stories?" Logan walked up to the group of mutants.

"Hey Logan, like when did you get back?"

"My trip didn't go well. Turns out that man who came to my house was actually a mailman and not a secret government agent. Guess I shouldn't have threatened to tear his skin off inch by inch. Anyway, I heard something about stories."

"Yeah, take a look at this." Kurt reopened his laptop, searched up a couple of Logan's stories, and teleported over next to him. He offered up the laptop, which Logan took a quick glance at.

Logan skimmed through a few stories and

"MY ENTIRE PAST HAS BEEN ON THE INTERNET FOR MONTHS AND I'M JUST LEARNING ABOUT IT NOW!"

Professor Xavier sighed. Now he had to explain that these were fictional stories. And that no, it was not a plot concocted by the government to misguide Logan. It was going to be a long day.

"We'll talk. As for you two, I want you to find Kitty and the three of you are to return those computers back to the school. Then, you three can expect extra danger room sessions."

"What!"

"That is your punishment, deal with it. Now Logan, come into my office for a moment."

Logan and the professor walked off. Rogue sighed and said, "Let's find Kitty. By the way, I blame you for this."

Rogue and Kurt went off to find Kitty. Little did any of them know that somebody else had been listening.

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Many miles away, another person was listening in on this conversation. Deep underground, Area 52 (conveniently located next to Area 51) was a man named Agent Smith. He had been eavesdropping on their conversation thanks to a special government recording device. After hearing the conversation end, he ran up to his boss, Nick Fury.

"Sir, I found something you might be interested in."

Nick Fury, head of SHIELD, and the man responsible for the mutants, sighed. The eavesdropping on the mansion idea had come from a pencil pusher in Washington. The idiots in Washington thought they would be getting valuable information about the mutants. Instead, most of the stuff they got was teenage chatter ("Do you think he likes me", "If he likes me why hasn't he asked me out", "If you like Remy, why don't you just admit it"). He was a trained government agent, when he signed up for a "top secret mission regarding the most dangerous people on Earth", this wasn't what he had in mind.

"What is it now? And if it has anything to do with Cyclopes and Jean Gray, I don't want to hear it."

"Sir, it's about Weapon X. Listen to this quote from a recent conversation."

Agent Smith punched a few buttons and Wolverine's voice came out of the computer speakers.

"MY ENTIRE PAST HAS BEEN ON THE INTERNET FOR MONTHS AND I'M JUST LEARNING ABOUT IT NOW!"

Suddenly, Nick Fury's cellphone began ringing. It was a secure line from Washington, and his bosses. He picked it up cringing.

"How did the Weapon files get pasted onto the internet? This is a colossal security breach. We expect you to fix it immediately." Then, the Washington agents hung up.

Fury sighed. The two things he hated listening to were the mutant's teenage conversations and his bosses' idiotic commands. He shrugged his soldiers and faced Agent Smith.

"Call a Code Red immediately."

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Meanwhile, back at the Institute, Scott was still in a depressed state. Looking at tons of stories where he and Jean broke up, he began to wonder what he should do. He decided that he needed some help. Then, he realized that the Institute was not the place to get romantic help. He went to Google and decided he was going to need to get outside help. The first website he clicked on was titled "Your relationship is fading and you need desperate help. You've come to the right place." Scott smiled and began reading.

**Next chapter, the Brotherhood makes its appearance. So does Remy (and my chance to make ROMY fans everywhere hate me). Review (and don't say anything bad or the x-men will be dissing your fanfics next).**


	4. The joys of mutant summer school

**Disclaimer: I'm running out of ways to say 'I don't own the x-men.'**

Down in Area 52, Nick Fury was watching carefully as a swat team assembled into formation. This special team of professionals was the **W**e **H**ate **Y**ou division, also known as WHY. As in, why was the government spending millions of dollars on a special swat team to deal with peaceful teenagers. As the team assembled in their mutant-proof combat stealth suits, Nick Fury sighed. His bosses refused to believe that there was no security breach; it was just a bunch of people making up stories. No, his bosses wanted answers, and getting those answers usually involved shooting, explosions, and wasting tons of money. As he was thinking, Nick's cellphone went off. It was his bosses, again.

"Is everything in position?" a deep voice asked on his cellphone.

"Yes, we will soon be ready to invade the manor at Saturday at 0900 hours. Permission to speak freely?"

"Granted."

"With all due respect (none whatsoever), this attack is uncalled for and a total waste of money."

"We have more than enough money to pay for this and any other missions, and your opinion is not wanted."

Nick sighed, they wanted an attack and they would get one. "If we have all this money, any chance of a raise?" For all the grief Nick went through, he got about as much money as the gossip columnist for the paper, minus the publicity.

"Permission to speak freely withdrawn. Obey your orders. Don't screw up." With these words, Nick hung up and put away his cellphone. The mutants were in for a big surprise.

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While Nick was preparing an attack on the mansion, somebody else was planning a similar attack on the mansion. No, it is not Magneto. It was Logan. Logan, finally convinced that he would have to keep looking for his past elsewhere, was meeting with Professor Xavier.

"It's brilliant, the perfect exercise to test these kids." Logan exclaimed.

Xavier was cautious, Logan's other ideas had a tendency to cause disasters. "Remind me what you are going to do again."

"We're going to simulate an attack on the Institute. I've got a couple reliable friends I convinced to pretend to be hostile soldiers. They'll attack the Institute with some weapons Hank designed. We are conveniently out of town, so the kids have to 'defend' themselves from the attack."

"I suppose the children could use some training. Remind me again how you know these people."

"Met them in a bar."

"Great, I'm going to trust my students with a group of drunks."

"Yep. That a problem?"

"Nah. When's this attack going to happen."

"We'll leave soon, and the fake attack will be on Saturday at 9:00.

"Sounds good. Let's start packing."

Xavier and Logan left to go pack for their vacation.

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Downstairs, Scott was reading through his internet self-help guide to love. With the help of the guide, he realized his relationship with Jean sucked, and that he should start fixing it. The first item on the list said that a romantic dinner would help repair the bond between them. Then, Jean came into the room telekinetically carrying a couple giant boxes.

"Hey Jean." Scott said.

"Hey Scott, what's up?"

"Nothing much. Say, are you interested in dinner tonight, just the two of us."

"Sure, any special occasion?"

"We've officially been going out for 187 days."

"You're counting?"

"Errrr…"

"Never mind, I'd love dinner tonight. See ya." Jean lightly kissed Scott and walked into the next room mentally carrying the boxes. Scott smiled, something was accually going right with his relationship with Jean (don't get too happy, I get to ruin their date later in the chapter).

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After about an hour of searching through the entire mansion, Kurt and Rogue finally found Kitty. Kitty was in her bedroom lying down on her bed listening to an Ipod. When Kurt and Rogue walked into the room, she took off her headphones and looked up.

"Hey Kitty. Bad news, we got busted. We have to take the laptops back to school." Kurt informed Kitty.

"Well, that's not so bad. At least we like don't have extra danger room sessions with Logan."

"We got extra danger room sessions too."

"Oh. That sucks."

"Come on, let's get this over with."

"Wait a second, if Kurt is the one who got the laptops, then like why are all of us being punished?"

"Because that wouldn't be a very good story line." Rogue replied suddenly.

"Huh?"

"I have no idea what I just said. But, look on the bright side, Lance should be at school too."

Kitty beamed at the thought of seeing Lance, and Rogue was busy trying to figure out what came over her. Chalking it up to the late night danger room sessions, she dismissed her weird comment.

"So, let's get going." Kurt said, while grabbing Kitty and Rogue. Then, the three of them teleported out of the room.

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At school, the three mutants teleported into an empty classroom. Looking around, they made sure nobody was around, and then went into the hallway.

"I got these laptops from room 102, that's around the corner and five doors that way."

As the mutants turned across the corner, they met up with Remy.

"Chere, what a pleasant surprise" Remy said, surprised and very happy.

"Just when I thought this couldn't get any worse" Rogue replied miserably.

Piertro sped in and asked "So, what brings the perfect x-geeks to summer school?"

"Yo, who are we talking to?" Toad, Blob, Lance, and Wanda were running behind Piertro, lacking his super speed to get to the three x-men.

"Hey Kitty" Lance said, also pleased that his girlfriend had suddenly appeared in summer school.

"Hey Lance" Kitty replied, just as happy as Lance.

"Oh brother, I think I'm going to be sick." Piertro replied, obviously annoyed.

"Much as I hate to agree with Piertro on anything, we really should put those computers back."

"Wait, you guys stole computers?" Remy, who had been busy admiring Rogue, looked up.

"Well, Kurt stole the computers; we're just like, guilty by association."

All of the Brotherhood mutants except Lance and Wanda looked obviously confused. "It means Kurt got busted, but we were around so we got blamed too."

"Oh, that makes more sense."

"What did you need computers that bad for anyway?"

"Well, Kurt found this really cool website, so he got us laptops so we could like look at them. It's a bunch of online stories about us."

"Huh"

"People wrote fictional stories about us and posted them on the internet."

Rogue popped open her laptop and opened up a few stories. The Brotherhood mutants (plus Remy) all crowded around the computer, wanting to see the stories. Lance eventually gave up and went into one of the classrooms. He returned with six more laptops.

"Here, I got us 6 new laptops. By the way, you can keep those laptops as long as you want."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, I just asked Mr. Harton. He's so stoned; he agreed to let us all keep these laptops."

"Cool."

While the Brotherhood mutants were crowding around their laptops, Remy was busy flirting with Rogue.

"So chere, you doing anything tonight?"

"That it, were leaving!" Rogue yelled. She grabbed onto Kitty and Kurt and yelled at Kurt, "Take us home, now."

"Bye Lance" Kitty said as the three of them disappeared with a whiff of smoke.

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Back at the Institute, Logan had met up with Scott, who was busy getting ready for his date with Jean.

"Hey kid, we're going out of town, so I need you to watch over everybody until we get back."

"Who's leaving?"

"Me, the Professor, Hank, and Storm. You're going to be the oldest person left, so I expect you to watch over these kids."

"But, I have a date tonight."

"Well then, have your date here, but to NOT leave these kids alone. Got it?"

"Yes"

Logan left the room to get together with the other adult mutants. Scott was bummed; his romantic dinner with Jean was going to be canceled. Then, an idea popped into his head. If he couldn't take Jean out for dinner, maybe he could have a romantic dinner in the institute.

**Turns out a lied when I said I get to make ROMY fans hate me (but don't worry, they will. I'm just making sure JOTT fans hate me first). Hey, I need something to make people look forward to the next chapter. Speaking of which, review or there won't be a next chapter.**


	5. Scott's wonderful date

Top of Form

Bottom of Form

**Disclaimer: I don't own the x-men. Or Area 52 (which I would go into more detail about, but the government might not like that).**

**A/N: As many reviews have pointed out to me, I mixed up Jamie and Bobby a few times in the original version of this chapter. It's all part of my elaborate plot where Xavier switches their minds…ok, I screwed up. Anyway, it is now fixed up; thanks to Toad's Angel and whylime for pointing that out.**

Scott spent two hours trying to prepare his romantic dinner with Jean. He desperately wanted everything to be perfect, so he borrowed a few ideas from the internet. When he was finished, he had set up a nicely set up table with candles and flowers. He prepared a turkey (leftover from Thanksgiving, been in deep freeze since), a bottle of wine ('borrowed' from Hank's private stash), and a small cake for dessert. Happy that everything was prepared, Scott left to get ready for his big date.

Amara, Jamie, Bobby walked in to Scott's wonderfully prepared dinner. Amara and Bobby were arguing over who was stronger, while Jamie was just hoping that the two mutants would start fighting. In the excitement, none of the mutants noticed the elaborate set up.

"Fire melts ice; get that into your rock hard head" Amara shouted at Bobby.

"Well, I have better control. Scott said so himself" Bobby shouted back.

"But my element is more powerful. Jean told me I'm the strongest new mutant." Amara yelled.

"Fight! Fight!" Jamie was waving his hands up and down in the air, waiting for Amara and Bobby to start killing each other.

"We're not going to fight Jamie" Amara told Bobby.

"For once, Amara's right. It wouldn't be polite to fight with a lady." Bobby said.

"What's that suppose to mean?"

"Well, everybody knows that boys are stronger than girls, so it wouldn't be fair for me…"

Amara was clenching her teeth trying to hold back her desire to cook Bobby on the spot. Bobby continued on oblivious to the dangerous road he was treading on. Suddenly, he stopped talking and looked up alarmed.

"The table! It's on fire!"

Amara's powers had gotten a little out of control and the candles had ignited. The candle flames were bigger than the candle could contain, and the flowers and a good part of the tablecloth were on fire.

"Put it out! Put it out!"

Bobby fired an ice beam at the table. He managed to put out the fire. And completely ruin what was left of Scott's table. As the steam faded, Amara and Bobby looked at the completely destroyed fancy dinner table.

"Oops"

"I think we just screwed up"

"Brilliant deduction Amara"

"Oh man, somebody put a lot of work into that. And I don't think that whoever set all that up is going to be happy."

"I agree"

Amara and Bobby looked at each other for a second, and then looked at the table. After a minute of thought, they looked back at each other and smiled.

"Jamie did it" they said simultaneously. Then they heard a beeping noise coming from the kitchen. The two mutants ran towards the kitchen, just to run into about six Jamies. Amara and Jamie ran into two of the Jamies staring at the oven. The oven was beeping like crazy and smoke was beginning to come out of the oven.

"I think I pushed something I shouldn't have" one of the Jamies said.

Alarmed, Amara quickly opened the oven door. Coughing away the smoke, she saw one completely burnt turkey. Shaking her head, she closed the oven door and sighed.

"Turkey's burnt to a crisp."

"What a waste of food."

One of the Jamies looked at the burnt turkey and moaned.

"Damn. I need something to get my mind off this. Give me a swig of that."

Amara and Bobby looked up to see 4 Jamie passing around a bottle of wine. All four Jamie were in different stages of drunkenness, ranging from tipsy to one Bobby who was passed out on the floor.

"Oh God"

"How come Jamie gets to get wasted, but I'm not allowed to even touch beer"

"We'll talk about this later. Just help me cart Jamie up to his room"

Eventually, Amara and Bobby managed to move all 6 Jamies to his room. Some of the Jamies were able to walk by themselves, others needed to be pushed or carried. As the Jamies lay down out of trouble, Amara couldn't help but feel a little sorry for whoever made the fancy dinner she and Bobby had just ruined.

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Later that night, Jean was preparing for her date with Kitty and Rogue. Which meant Jean was trying on every article of clothing she owned, while Kitty and Rogue (mostly Kitty) gave their opinions.

"Remind me why we have to do this every single time. You don't have any new clothes, can't you just wear the ones you wore last time."

Jean and Kitty looked at Rogue like she was crazy. Jean continues looking at dresses.

"Forget I said anything"

After a few more minutes of trying on clothes, Jean finally decided on a red dress. Smiling, she put on the dress and went to Scott's room.

Rogue and Kitty went back to their room and lay down. Kitty got out her Ipod, and Rogue got out a book.

"Isn't it romantic? Scott's taking Jean out for dinner. Think Lance would do an.ything like that for me?"

"Knowing the Brotherhood, the date would turn into a disaster before the main course arrived."

"Well, Jean and Scott's dates never end up as disasters."

"That's because it's 'meant to be'. Have you ever seen two people more perfect for each other?" There was a slight hint of jealousy in Rogue's voice, but Kitty was too preoccupied to notice. As Kitty listed all the reasons she and Lance we're meant for each other, Rogue sighed and wondered how Scott's date was going.

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Jean knocked once on Scott's door. Scott opened the door wearing a nice shirt. He was speechless as he looked at Jean (Scott doesn't do well talking to Jean if you haven't noticed). Jean helped him out by asking "So, where are you taking me for dinner?"

Scott regained some of his composure and replied that since all the adults were out of town and had forbidden him from leaving the house, he thought that they could have a romantic dinner in the Institute.

Jean was a bit disappointed, but Scott proceeded to lead Jean to the table he had set up for the two of them. The table was a complete mess; half the table was covered in ice while half the table. Scott ran into the kitchen and saw his burnt turkey and empty wine bottle. Jean looked around and asked, "So, where's the fancy dinner?"

Scott began stuttering in amazement. He began forming half-sentences both apologizing to Jean and threatening to kill whoever destroyed his fancy dinner. Jean took a quick peak inside Scott's mind to see that he had made a fancy dinner, it had just gotten wrecked. She smiled and suggested, "I'll head to the supermarket and get us dinner. I should be back in about 15 minutes. You stay here and make sure I don't come back to a crazy party and a half-destroyed manner. Ok?" Scott had no chance but to agree with Jean's suggestion, so Jean grabbed her car keys and went out. As soon as Jean was safely gone, Scott went on a war hunt to find who destroyed his fancy dinner.

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Xavier and Logan we're having an argument about the best type of breakfast cereal. They were having this argument in the Baeville Supermarket. The adults were supposed to be out of town for a few days, but they couldn't get onto the plane. Logan kept setting off the metal detector and airport security refused to let him through. So, they had rented a few rooms at the Baeville Motel and decided that being away from the mansion was good enough. Eventually, they had gotten hungry, and after getting fed up with restaurants refusing to give them food because they were mutants, they had conceded to just buy something at the supermarket.

"Fruit Loops are the best cereal, hands and adamantium claws down." Logan said proudly.

"I'm telling you, Captain Crunch is the best." Xavier replied.

"I knew Captain Crunch. Another one of those crazed super soldier experiments that the government tried to pull make back during the Cold War. Wacko was obsessed with cereal. I refuse to eat anything with his name on it."

"You're making that up. Besides, a deranged toucan isn't much better."

Hank was busy on the phone making sure everything was planned for the mock attack on the Institute. Ororo was inspecting every piece of fruit looking at whether they were ripe or not.

"Hey Ororo, come here. We need to you settle a dispute me and Charles are having."

Putting down the fruit she was inspecting, Ororo walked over. "Please don't tell me this is about the best type of pop tarts."

"No, we simply need to know what type of cereal…"

Logan put his hand up, sniffing the air for a moment. He growled a bit and said, "we're about to have company."

Just then, Jean walked by carrying supplies for her romantic dinner. She stopped when she saw Logan and Ororo. "Aren't you guys suppose to be out of town?"

The three mutants were completely caught off guard. "Errr…"

Just then, Hank came by talking on his phone. "Allright then, the Institute gets attacked at nine a.m. sharp. I'll be by to drop off the weapons…" Hank took one look at Jean, then one look at the three stunned adults. "…I'm going to have to call you back."

"Attack on the institute? What are you guys talking about?"

Ororo looked scared and said, "Logan, do something."

Logan looked just as worried and said, "Charles, do something."

Charles looked even more worried and closed his eyes for a second. Suddenly, Jean fell to the ground unconscious. Ororo ran over to her and picked her up.

"Nice going." Ororo said as she picked up Jean.

"You said do something. I panicked ok?"

"You knocked one of our students out cold." Hank said, putting down the cell phone. Logan however, didn't seem as worried as the other two.

"This ain't so bad. We'll just keep Jean here on ice until after the attack. Then, Charles can revive her and problem's solved."

"That might work Logan. Remember, if she asks, she fainted. I had nothing to do with it."

The four mutants carried Jean out and back to the hotel. Ororo put Jean in her room for the night, and the four adults decided to visit the bar next door.

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Two hours later, Scott was sitting miserably by his wrecked dinner. Kitty walked in looking for a snack, when she saw Scott sulking.

"Like, what's wrong?" Kitty asked in her typical valley-girl style.

"Somebody destroyed my dinner, and Jean went out to go get some food."

"So?'

"She left two hours ago. How long does it take to pick up dinner?"

"Maybe she like, got a flat tire, or got stuck in traffic."

"Maybe."

"It's not like she abandoned you to go out with some hot guy or anything."

This last statement did not help cheer Scott up at all. Kitty shrugged, grabbed a cookie, and phased through the wall. Scott brought out a laptop and began desperately looking for online love help. Eventually, he found a website titled, "The woman you love is cheating on you, what do you do?"

**I decided to name my chapters because I can. Now that I've ruined Scott's fancy date, I can move on to other people. Next chapter is dedicated completely to the Brotherhood. Review or terrible things will happen to you.**

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